It’s summer, which means two things for me in sunny Florida. One, it means I’m going to be spending the next few months sweating profusely from every pore in my body because it’s a 100 degrees outside and I don’t have A/C in my car. Two, it means that I’m spending a bunch of hard earned cash to go see movies so you guys will know what sucks and what is worth dropping thirty-five dollars on with a night out with your significant other.
Though this summer it seems like we were bombarded with movies I felt like we’ve all scene before. The plots were all kind of contrived and stereotypical of the summer blockbuster. It felt as though we were getting rehashed sequels in the same vain as Lethal Weapon 4. Same characters, same one liners, just better special effects. I’m breaking the movies into three categories. See it in the theater, rent it, and burn it! Fortunately this time there aren’t any burn its, but that’s because I didn’t bother watching 17 Again and The Proposal.
Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen
Rating: See it in the theater!
I wasn’t expecting an Oscar winning performance by either Shia LeBeoff or Megan Fox, and they didn’t disappoint. The movie clocked in at 2 hrs and 20 minutes, making it slightly longer than my last dentist appointment, and a hell of a lot more painful to watch.
The plot is as followed. The Decepticons and Autobots are waging war again, Megatron comes back from his undersea grave to rage havoc and of course Optimus Prime and the rest of the crew are there to stop him. Pretty cut and dry, and that’s what you expect from Michael Bay and the Transformers. I did like the fact that the robot battles were longer and the Transformers this time around were actually pretty entertaining.
The one thing that did annoy me is the “relationship” between Fox and LeBeouf. Fox’s character keeps begging for LeBeouf to say “I love you.” Lets just be clear, if Megan Fox is your girlfriend, your surrounded by big scary robots who might end your life just by stepping on you by accident, you would tell her every day that you love her. That was my big pet peeve. Other than that, the movie was what you would expect. Lots of destruction, explosions, and some pretty good comic relief from everyone involved.
Terminator 4: Salvation
Rating: Rent it!
I’m not even going to bother with this one. You know the story already. Apocalyptic future controlled by machines who want to destroy man-kind (Matrix anyone?) and their fearless leader John Conner leading them into battle.
Seriously you’ve seen Terminator 2, why bother seeing this? I spent two hours in the theater damn near falling asleep. Avoid this, or if you’re really a masochist, go rent it.
X-Men: Wolverine Origins:
Rating: Rent it!
Ryan Reynolds, Will.I.Am, and Hugh Jackman, seriously what more could one ask for ? Perhaps more Deadpool, which was my major beef. Ryan Reynolds few lines as the wise cracking Deadpool were pulled straight out of the comic books, but his screen time over all was minimal, nor did he have that quintessentially bad-ass Deadpool ninja costume.
The plot is simple: Sabertooth and Wolverine get recruited to a make shift “Alpha-Flight” team composed of a bunch of X-Men who had never actually been in the original Alpha-Flight team. Gambit, Wolverine, Deadpool, John Wraith, and Cyclops. While it completely screws up the continuity of the comic books, but hey, whatever it’s not like they’ve kept it up so far. Sabertooth ends up going crazy, Wolvie gets some Adamantium to stop him, and away we go.
I can’t say this was terrible, because it was exactly what I expected. Though I wouldn’t go rush out to see it, this is a rental for sure.
I agree with all three assessments. Terminator 4 was an all-time disappointment for me. They had an incredible cast, a better-than-average budget and tons of plot elements to make it work yet it failed miserably. Bummer.